Life is a real mystery.

Since I have been here in Malaysia, I cant stop thinking why i choosed this university out of all i got and that also, so far from my own country. Was I running away from something I didn't want to face?! Or Simply was i kindof fedup with keep trying to fight destiny.. I wonder.. One thing am sure is that am really happy to be away from all these. These referring to things that have been making my life a real living hell. Since I came back from Pakistan in 2006, my life was going on smoothly till some day in 2007, my destiny took a pretty curve in the wrong direction. Life is a mystery because you can't always expect things going on as you want it to be, and that's maybe what i don't want to understand. In April 2007 i came across someone who made me feel alive inside, like making my heart beat for real. Maybe I was too afraid to lose that someone that i started to act like a real psychopath.lol yep that is true afterall, you don't obviously want to lose someone you care so much about. It did not take so long before i realise life isn't going to give you whatever you want to of course but still then, i did not lose hopes. Yea i know, Hopes are what keep fouls alive but i don't care. :) The only problem here is that I don't know much about that person in reality, just some sms, phone calls but i feel completely a different person when talking to her, it's just like it's real me. Well I dont expect most of you to have ever experience such kind of feeling, but if you had, then you might be understanding what i mean here. Well you can guess the ending would be disastrous as the real feelings were just one-sided. Maybe she is right afterall, i don't even know her completely but truely am sure and certain that in knowing her more, i would be respecting her more & more. If you ask me, what i see in her that much , I won't be able to express it, i tried but never been able to translate the language of the heart in the human's language; sorry dudes. And that's the sole reason i went so far from my own country in a way to escape things, but in turn out to be the contrary..lol life goes on but will i ever forget her? Will I ever be able to become a normal person again? I just can't help keep wondering.. Cheers