Moving Forward...

"No one knows what the future holds, but you ha, ha, listen close, they say reach in yo' heart and you'll find your mind"- 2PAC

I wonder if that singer is crazy sometimes but when you reach a certain phase of your life, where everything except your skin is falling apart, you will understand how those cursing, fucking songs of his are awesome. Getting acquainted to such kind of phase is not only blissful but rather orgasmic. Such orgasms that pull you out of this sweet, smooth, and soft cocoon you have built around yourself to the sheer pleasure.. a sheer pleasure of pain that will force you to realize that life isn't a dream and you need constantly such kind of pain to make you realize that you are drifting away from your goals, you are drifting afar from what you are.


I've been receiving emails saying that dude, stop with these philosophical & psychological stuffs am writing & compiling. I nearly rofl when I read a specific one saying she's missing my melodramas of my life. How can you guys? All my other blogs are full of those craps and still you did not complain. Yep sometimes, someone's sorrows can be someone's happiness & satisfaction. But missy I don’t mean that for you anyway, I'm just saying that in general. Well the fact that I'm not writing anything these days is because I've moved on. Shocked ,uh? Don't be, when you love, you will know how to let go, specially when she is happy. Anyway this is a past chapter now, life goes on, right? Maybe just ahead the corner, there's someone meant for me. Aha na na am not getting back to my old playboy self, do not worry. I'm just thinking positively. Anyway I won't feed you any philosophical or psychological craps for today, I'm just tired of answering individual emails, so thought about telling it through the blog so you can at last find peace of mind! :) Life is going on smoothly, so sorry for not sharing anything with you for the time being, I was just busy with some works, some new friends, some new hobbies…….. Everything is a blessing in life, we do not understand its wisdom immediately..


“May God give you...For every storm a rainbow, for every tear a smile, for every care a promise and a blessing in each trial. For every problem life sends, a faithful friend to share, for every sigh a sweet song and an answer for each prayer.”
 

Do We have what we need the most in a relationship?

How ironic life can be sometimes, just came out of a meeting with some business surveys hot chicks which went pretty well and I came here sitting alone in the darkness of my room letting my mind wandering about how this world is evolving, why do we need relationships to keep our human side alive.. Guess it will always remain a mystery. Loads among you must be watching the series "Dirty Sexy Money", if not, do a must to watch it, you will understand why I am saying so if you know how to read between the lines of the script.

Anyhow I've just been staring at one its' episodes while my mind wandering around, when I suddenly came back to earth when I heard some wonderful sayings out of that episode which I'll try to reproduce from what I understood.

Whenever we fall in love, or get involve with someone romantically, there are some of sidelines that we usually look for willingly & even unwillingly as they are engraved in the human instinct of survival. Since long time ago, it is known as the mystery of a relationship, we human beings, we look for mainly 2 letters starting by "C' which I'll try to brief from what I understood and feel part of.

1. First of all, there is "Confirmation", lovers provide confirmation for each other, that is, when a person sees a shooting star or an aurora, then they need to have someone to turn to all the time, to whom to which to say: "did you see that? Did that really happen?" And in a life that is full of amazing moments, it is important to have…."confirmation"…


 “When we hear news we should always wait for the sacrament of confirmation”

2. Secondly there is "Consolation", lovers provide consolation for each other when bad luck, death or… even the simple sadness of the passing beauty becomes hard to make it go on, then you have someone to turn to for a hand, for an embrace, for a kiss, for….."consolation".

“For it is the suffering flesh, it is suffering, it is death, that lovers perpetuate upon the earth. Love is at once the brother, son, and father of death, which is its sister, mother, and daughter. And thus it is that in the depth of love there is a depth of eternal despair, out of which springs hope and consolation.”

3. The last but not the least, there is "Joy", *Chuckles* it is not a "C" word, but then, what the heck… life and love is surprising most of the time.

“Though he turned the pages with the sensuous joy of the book-lover, he did not know what he was reading, and one book after another dropped from his hand. Suddenly, among them, he lit on a small volume of verse which he had ordered because the name had attracted him: "The House of Life." He took it up, and found himself plunged in an atmosphere unlike any he had ever breathed in books; so warm, so rich, and yet so tender, that it gave a new and haunting beauty to the most elementary of human passions.”


I hope you will recognize your true quests when you will read it, as a bit of wisdom and reality is a very good cocktail sometimes to boost up a roller coasting life..

 

Am I living or My Life Hasn't yet Started?

           Hi folks, as you know there are lots of things in my life that I am trying to mend right now, and from now on, the Faaleh you know these last few months, well I've killed him. Oh com'on do not be so surprise as if you do not know me well already. This time, it will be the old me, the dangerous me, the risk-taker me. I am tired of caring for people, I am tired of  making sure they do not get hurt when they do not even care if it happens or not. So from now on, no melodrama, just me & my old good waves of inspirations. 

          If there is something I've learnt during those few past months, then it is how it is difficult to let go, even of someone you have just met and who has made such an impact on your life even though you've not allowed it to happen. Anyway everything happens for a good reason right, so let us be optimistic and let me give you this piece of advice; as you grow up, you will learn that even the one person that wasn’t supposed to ever let you down probably will. You will have your heart broken probably more than once and it’s harder every time. You’ll break hearts too, so remember how it felt when yours was broken. You’ll fight with your best friend. You’ll blame a new love for things an old one did. You’ll cry because time is passing too fast, and you’ll eventually lose someone you love. So take too many pictures, laugh too much, and love like you’ve never been hurt because every sixty seconds you spend upset is a minute of happiness you’ll never get back. Don’t be afraid that your life will end, be afraid that it will never begin.

Dedicated to Miss Nostalgia:

Over there, just beneath the moon,
There’s a man with a burden to keep,
Now sleep will fall, washouts, rags and paper bags
Homes and lives passing by.

Who will see the beauty in your life?
And who will be there to hear you when you call?
Who will see the madness in your life?
And who will be there to catch you if you fall?

Dreams run wild, as lovers find their way through the night,
Not a care in the world
And over there, oh the twinkling of the lights, harbour lights
Say goodnight one more time…
 

Rational Thinking-To What Extreme?

Let me start out by saying that I deeply value and respect rational thinking. I think that rational thought is a valuable foundation for decision-making and I value the sensibility that it embodies. However, I am not entirely enamored by claims of "rational thought" and here are a few reasons why.

Rational thinking is only half the story. I have found that if a person has a strong emotional stake in an outcome, he or she usually constructs arguments to support that outcome. In the scientific literature, this is called "motivated reasoning" and a brain imaging study has shown that it activates very different brain regions from "cold reasoning". In many matters of life, motivated reasoning masquerades as cold reasoning and "rational" thought, when in fact, it is reason that is based on an emotional response. Even if people say something with a straight face and blinking eyes, this form of rational utterance often has an emotional basis. When people have an emotional stake in an outcome, I almost never consider their arguments to be "purely rational".

The brain imaging study that showed different brain activation for motivated reasoning as opposed to regions previously linked to cold reasoning, also showed that implicit and not explicit emotional centers contributed to this motivated reasoning. That is, we are not usually aware of how emotions shape our decisions, but they do. On the surface, we may be convinced that we have removed all emotion from a decision, but we cannot exclude the possibility that our unconscious emotional stake has influenced our decision. I do not believe that this is anything to be ashamed of either. Our emotions carry important information that is often critical for decision-making. Unconscious fear, for example, may help us avoid dangerous situations.

Another reason that I think that "surface rationality" is questionable is that we often make decisions based on how options are presented to us. This has been called the "framing effect". In fact, the brain can try to overcome this effect, but overcoming this often requires more time than we have. Often, past experiences strongly influence how we respond "rationally" and may also influence how we take information in, even if we develop a rational framework to explain our thought processes. Essentially, emotions and world-views powerfully affect the way in which we construct arguments. Ask a Democrat to come up with reasons for why taxes should not be cut for small business owners, or ask a homophobe to provide arguments for why gay marriage should be allowed, and you will see how difficult it is for people to think outside of their identified allegiances.

Rational thinking also often rests on "believing" what the brain sees, but there are countless examples of how our brains can trick us into thinking things. We see mirages in deserts even when there is no water. If we bring two horizontal lines in the same plane close enough together, our brains will see them and report them to us as one. Amputees can feel pain in a limb that is not present. We cannot hear dog whistles. Our "convictions" rely heavily on our senses, but our senses do not always tell us the truth. Building a rational argument based on what can be seen or heard or touched has its limitations.

Another reason that I think that "rational" thinking is not what it might appear to be is that our brains are limited in the amount of information they can take in at any one point in time. Thus, while we may feel as though we are being thorough in the way we think, we usually filter out many things so that the brain is not overwhelmed. This filtering sometimes leaves out critical aspects of rational thinking and we are far less comprehensive than we might think we are. We remember things incorrectly or forget things often as well. Our brains may make up stories that join time points to create a sense of continuity, much like how they can make two horizontal lines look like one when they are close enough.

Rational thinking may therefore not be as "rational" as it seems. Perhaps we need to learn to accept and be more open about how our emotions influence the ways in which we think, since that is the reality anyway?

The only 1 flaw in Women....

Women have strengths that amaze men.
They bear hardships and they carry burdens,
but they hold happiness, love and joy.


They smile when they want to scream.
They sing when they want to cry.
They cry when they are happy
and laugh when they are nervous.
They fight for what they believe in.
They stand up to injustice.


They don't take "no" for an answer
when they believe there is a better solution.


They go without so their family can have.
They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.
They love unconditionally.
They cry when their children excel
and cheer when their friends get awards.


They are happy when they hear about
a birth or a wedding.
Their hearts break when a friend dies.
They grieve at the loss of a family member,
yet they are strong when they
think there is no strength left.
They know that a hug and a kiss
can heal a broken heart.


Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors.


They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you
to show how much they care about you.


The heart of a woman is what
makes the world keep turning.


They bring joy, hope and love.
They have compassion and ideas.
They give moral support to their
family and friends.


Women have vital things to say
and everything to give.


HOWEVER, IF THERE IS ONE FLAW IN WOMEN,
IT IS THAT THEY FORGET THEIR WORTH.

The Two Magnet Ends Of A Relationship..

Whether it be love or a simple friendship, we all have our ideas on how we want to pursue these relationships. Such idealism is not without its danger though. More often than not, we are hurt because the ideals we hold true so strongly don't work in a reality we live in.

It feels like every time we work so hard to build a relationship based upon the ideals that we consider honorable and just or romantic and true, our world gets turned over and proven wrong. Condemning us to the bitter isolated melancholy that is our pride humiliated and our hopes in ruin. A long time ago, I was just another face hurt by having my ideals spat in my own face. Today, it's a whole different story.

It just takes a while to realise that no matter how much we put stock into the ideals that friends should be there when we need them or that love is the basis for all relationships, those ideals can't exist in the real world. They may work for some people lucky enough to not have been hurt, but for the rest of us who do live our lives as it should, those hopes are seem nothing more than fragile strings in a freak storm.

A recent conversation with an old friend brought out the contrasting ideals of what I used to believe and what I hold on to now. How we pursue our ideals with as much faith and conviction as possible so that its purity isn't corrupted in the face of reality, shattering its meaning, and thus all we have worked for. In her mind, she will keep holding on to her beliefs regardless of all the factors that serve to corrupt how she thinks love and friendship should be. Like a shining beacon in the night, she strives to fight the death of common sense and romanticism by casting aside everything that serves to destroy it like our greed and selfishness.

In retrospect, I have embraced that corruption, impurity and darkness that society has deemed a hindrance to their ideals of the perfect friendship or relationship. I accept that no matter what we do, people will always remain human. Our greed and selfishness for the moments are proof of that humanity. So rather than casting aside what makes us who we are, I believe that we have to focus on what we do best and compensate for what we lack. Rather than starting a paradise in which you cast away the undesirables, you start with a barren desolate plot in which you build your perfect garden.

Roughly translated though it means that instead of trying to fit in people to our ideals of right and wrong, we figure that everyone is screwed up anyway and make do with them as friends or lovers by filling in the gaps in which they lack. That way, we're disappointed less if people do what people tend to do because we were expecting them to ruin a good thing. At the same time, the moments can be enjoyed for what they are, even surprising us that they lasted so long for what its worth.

In some ways, I value what my friend is doing because it was exactly what I used to do in days past, fighting to preserve the sanctity of my beliefs and I succeeded in keeping it afloat for as long as possible before it all came crashing down on me. She is doing what I could not do and I respect her wholly for that. I just stand by my way doing things now. Rewriting the concepts of friendship and love to suit not what I want, but what I see the world is. In understanding and accepting the worst in us, can we possibly hope to build the best that we are capable of.

Maybe we're not too different in the way we both stand by our beliefs. Just polar opposites of the same desires for love and a connection to our own kind, to which I don't think any one else would shy away either. We all do what we think is best for the sake of never being alone and that probably connects us better in ways that no of our concocted beliefs can ever come close to achieving. If only that alone could be the basis for friendships around the world, peace would be an understatement of an achievement.

Of course though, the world doesn't work that way either.

Oh well.