Crack the Code..Can You?

    

      
      Egocentric...Sarcastic...Narcissistic....These are some of the "ics" that composed my outer personality, which I am going to refer to my outer shell. Nobody can deny the fact that they do not live with their life with only one personality, otherwise the "potential" of being able to think and react to our environment would be totally futile. I've been looked upon by some people as a very bad guy without even knowing me personally and it seems they never came across that famous quote:"never judge a book by its cover", but anyhow even if i do not need to justify myself in front of  them, I just want to write about it as I've too much already to keep inside that brain of mine.


     I am a guy who lives by a set of principles, created out of peer pressure, habits, likes, dislikes and so on but my principles aren't fact-based but ratherthey are based on my experiences and I do not act as a robotized human being because my principles aren't the types you enter into data-bases of a robot. I will explain to you what I mean by my "outer shell", if you understand it, you will be able to guess what is my inner-shell hopefully. I live by this statement: "If you like someone to love you sincerely, you show them all your bad side first then if she is still around after it,she will be worthy to know your good side". To put it more simple for you, you can say "No one deserve you at your best when they can not handle you at your best".


     I am sure you know where I am going with this statement. I am someone who live by it, in any aspects of life,i've always shown the "ics" side of me first because if someone can not handle me in this realm, I do not go forward with it. Sometimes I choosed to be sarcastic,proud of myself a lot, extremely caring like a glue, act like a miser, extremely rude, act as if you are weak, stupid etc, and if someone who is just around to fool with you, you can trust me on that, you will not hear from him/her again even though it might damage your reputation a bit which I do not really care about as I know who I am. But if that someone is really into you, she/he will ask you why are you like that, why are you acting in such a way, she/he will try to find a way around it, find a solution to all these. Normally it wouldn't be a big deal as you can easily discard these "ics" when you know it is worth it to crack open that mysterious inner shell that you've been keeping hidden deep inside. 

     Many people might not see the wisdom with the way I deal with my life, but for me it makes sense, because I've experience it. Once you've set the bar low ("ics"), whatever you are going to show afterwards will do nothing except strengthening the bond between both of you as She/he will discover a new side of you which was totally hidden before and which will be much more appreciated after "ics" period. On top of that, the favor will be returned to you as it increases the chance that the relationship goes fluidly both ways, that is, two-ways communication which is always efficient and effective.  It is what we call an"up-turn" in a relationship whereby mysteries and unexpected things always pop up to keep the relationship "up" and "flourishing". 

     To better understand the philosophical and psychological aspects of what I said, which might be a bit hard for those who didn't undergo such kind of experiences before, I will try to implement it in a situation. Let us take Valentin day which was just recently, a lot of people hurried and bought precious stones, expensives gifts to express their love to their lovers,right? Let us say that someone bought something worth "100$" for the first valentin day,so for the second valentin day next year, he will have to buy something which will cost more than "100$" as he knows her lover will be expecting something much more better than last year. This is a psychological aspect that one can easily understand. The same goes with what I said before, you set the bar low, so that in the coming days, months, years, you do not need to over-outdo yourself to please someone you care about as if in the long run, it will cause only stress, depression and sadness.

      Hence once you've set the bar low, that is,show your outer self with full of these "ics", then when you move on slowly by showing your inner self slowly, it will just create a sense of gratitude and appreciation from the other party as changes in your character will be vividly identified.  Some might say this is a case of manipulation but in fact it is just the way you project your personality without tampering with it as we all have atoms of these "ics" buried deep inside us, and the only difference is that they are not that influential. The advantage here is that you have master all these characteristics of yours and also you've shown to the other party the whole of you (bad and good parts).
 
     And this is where the part "always expect the unexpected" comes into action. Life is boring if you know everything about your partner and you know the way your partner will react in such and such situation but if you go through the outer/inner shell formula, it will always keep your partner guessing what you would do in such and such situation and this creates a positive vibe and positive friction. I've heard that this is not good way to gain the trust of your partner but we should take into consideration that your partner won't be disappointed in any ways as He/She already knows the bad side of you and if He/She is still with you,means they can handle it and they've learnt to trust you no matter how bad it was in the beginning.

    This is all I've to say in the first post under the new tagomatic I've created. I will post more whenever I am free and please be aware that whatever I've said is just from my own opinion and experiences and I do not want you to try it without being confident of yourself first. Try it at your own risk as I do not want to receive emails saying "this happened and this blablabla..".I am not a philosopher,nor a therapist, nor psychologist so I can't  advice you in anything accurate or even if I do, I do not promise that it will work as it is all based on experiences and not scientific facts and as you know, experiences are subjective. 

Thank you